The "F Bomb"

Growing up in my middle-class, Catholic household, curse words were strictly forbidden. While the list of prohibited words was short, one swear stood out above the rest - the F Bomb.

Uttering it was unthinkable.

Uttering it was unthinkable.

The F Bomb possessed a unique identity, an eerie potency, and an aura of darkness. I still recall hushed whispers on the schoolyard if someone dared to "drop" it during recess, and the severe consequences that followed if caught by the watchful eyes of authority figures, often the nuns who served as our teachers.

Now, in the realm of adulthood, that four-letter word may still be offensive, but its power has diminished. I no longer fear it; the spell has been broken. It's simply a vulgar term in the wrong setting. However, a new force has taken its place as the reigning authority. As a grown-up, the ultimate four-letter word, wielding immense influence and lurking insidiously, is

F-E-A-R. Specifically, the fear of failure.

As women, we often feel like we have to be perfect in everything we do. We're expected to excel in our careers, be great mothers, supportive partners, and still look flawless while doing it all. It's no wonder that the fear of failure can be paralyzing.

But what if we changed our relationship with failure?

What if we saw it as a process rather than a definitive end?

What if we weren't afraid to fail?

The truth is, failure is not the opposite of success; it's a part of it.

Every successful person has experienced failure at some point in their lives. The key is not to avoid failure but to learn from it and use it as a stepping stone towards success. Don't be afraid to fail because failure is not final. It's an opportunity to learn and grow.

When we're afraid to fail, we're really afraid of the unknown.

We fear the consequences of not getting it right, the embarrassment of being seen as imperfect, or the disappointment of not meeting our own expectations. But what if we embraced the unknown? What if we saw it as an adventure rather than a threat?

It's time to follow our fear, not avoid it.

Give it a name and make it less scary. What would you call your fear if you wanted to make it less onerous? Remember, these names are meant to be amusing and light-hearted, making fear seem more approachable and less intimidating. How about Fred, Fifi or Florence? Speak directly to your fear, thank it for the fuel it provides and then shift that energy into productive action. When we face our fear head-on, we take back control and realize that the things we fear most are often not as scary as we imagine.

“Fail forward” should be our motto.

It means that every time we fail, we're one step closer to success. We should embrace failure, learn from it, and use it as fuel to drive us towards our dreams.

Consider some famous inspiring quotes from women about fear and failure that can help motivate us to change our relationship with failure:

J.K. Rowling: "It is impossible to live without failing at something, unless you live so cautiously that you might as well not have lived at all - in which case, you fail by default."

Maya Angelou: "You may encounter many defeats, but you must not be defeated. In fact, it may be necessary to encounter the defeats, so you can know who you are, what you can rise from, how you can still come out of it."

Oprah Winfrey: "Do the one thing you think you cannot do. Fail at it. Try again. Do better the second time. The only people who never tumble are those who never mount the high wire. This is your moment. Own it."

So, ladies, let's change our relationship with failure. Let's see it as a process, not an end. Let's not be afraid to fail, but rather embrace the unknown and go for our dreams. Remember, the only real failure is not trying at all.